I think it was the comedienne Rita Rudner who said “I need to have a baby soon before all of the names I’d choose remind me of people I hate.”
When my husband Darrin and I found out we were expecting, we’d spend hours going through baby names trying to find one in each sex we could agree on.
“Sally?” my husband said.
“Mmmm. I don’t think so.” It reminded me of an ex-boyfriend’s mom whose name was Sally.
“I’d like Jon. After my dad. But I have two ex-boyfriends named John, so that’s too weird.”
Then there was the misfortune that could befall our child if the name weren’t a good pairing with our last name which is Butters.
“I like Harrison.”
“Sure, but Harry Butters?”
“There could also be no Marjorie or Milton.”
“Benjamin is nice.”
“Nope. The curious case of Benjamin Butters?”
It went on like this for months.
It’s funny too how people have such strong opinions about YOUR baby’s name. I told someone at work early on one of the names we were considering, and she sneered and strongly encouraged me to keep thinking. Then of course, she offered me some suggestions of names she liked a lot better.
Darrin and I decided that we would keep the name to ourselves until our child was born. That would make it a like-it-or-love-it presentation of our actual baby, who’s name would at that point permanent and non-negotiable.
At work one day a co-worker with whom I wasn’t particularly close came to chat me up on the glory of pregnancy. We compared stories for a while when the conversation went toward the name.
“So, have you picked out a name?”
“Yes, but we’re not going to tell anyone until she’s born.”
“WHAT? Come on, just tell me. I won’t tell anyone.”
“Well, no. And it’s not really about that. It’s just that we found that people had some pretty strong opinions about baby names.”
“Really? Well, seriously, just tell me. Come onnnn.”
“Sorry, but nope.”
She thought for a minute then seemed to accept my answer. Then she added
“Well, as long as it’s not Madison, then I won’t hate it.”
My point exactly.
When we announced our daughter’s birth, and revealed her name as Julia Grace Butters, the reception was warm. We got many, many compliments on the name we’d chosen. Now, I agree, it is classic and beautiful; but does every person who claimed to love the name we chose really love it? Does it matter? No, it really doesn’t. We love it, and that was the point all along.
What a sweet story…Julia Grace is a beautiful name. Keep sharing!
posted on 8:42 am on 8/28/09Well I DO really love Julia Grace and I love that you kept it a secret! We didn’t tell anyone either, but only because we didn’t get to work on naming Lilly until we were at the hospital. I wanted to see the little lass before giving her a name so she was just “baby” for five whole days!
Can’t wait to read more of your blogs!
posted on 9:06 am on 8/28/09We did the same thing. My mother was so negative about every name thrown around that we had to keep it a secret. And we went so far as to give her list after list of fake potential names to keep her occupied. Some days I’d give her all names from Beatles songs..Sadie, Lucy, Rita, Jude, Prudence. She finally caught on when I told her we were going to name our daughter The Walrus. Another time I gave her all flowers. “Yes Mom, we are considering naming our baby Petunia Rose Chrisanthemum.” I think for the most part people are well meaning but “Oh! I love ‘Bailey’! That’s my dog’s name!” just isn’t really a very nice thing to say to a hyper emotional mother to be. We went with Evelynn Ruth and just like you, we love it and that’s all that matters. If you’re anything like we are, she’s rarely called by it anyway. Our daughter goes by “Monkey” and “Evie” more than Evelynn.
posted on 11:06 am on 8/28/09We made the mistake of telling. I sometimes wish we haddent. I’m American, and my Hubby is Dutch, and we live here VERY close to his huge family here in The Netherlands. We said * We’re gonna have a baby!* they said * YAY!!!* we said * we found out its gonna be a boy!!* they said * YAY!!* we said *we have decided to name him Ashley Floyd Buursen!* they said * uh.. ok… isnt that a girls name?* sigh.. no, in fact its not! its now considerd a unisex name, but back in the day it was a BOYS name only, ( in ireland and england). they said..thats nice…* I asked my hubbys mom if she had ever seen Gone with the wind.. she said ooooooooooooh i love that movie! I said, and whats the sexy guys name… she said O MY GOODNESS!! ITS ASHLEY! .. problem solved! LOL Its not why we named him Ashley..I hate gone with the wind, but it was the only thing that woould make sense to her… Ashley is acctually named after the main charactor in hubbys and mines fav moves..* The Evil Dead* and *Army of Darkness* we are horror movie freaks…heehee just dont tell my mother in law
posted on 1:04 pm on 8/29/09What a funny and lovely piece!
posted on 3:45 pm on 8/29/09Great writing, my sweet friend. Every time I hear or say Miss J’s name I sing the Beatles song to myself. xxx
posted on 9:31 am on 8/30/09I’m so happy that you are writing on this blog! Now I can find a little piece of you and your warmth and your humor whenever I need me some Mrs. Butters!
posted on 9:18 am on 9/1/09Congratulations and well done both on the fabulous Miss Julia and on your writing!